THOSE DAYS...2008

Here come again the last day of the year

flashing back all those memories in this year

bringing up & down the mood

there were lotz of lotz of

sweet & bad memories

Remember the first day for the year

I celebrated with all the Happy Crew in Penang

Missing those wonderful moment with all the 'HAPPY' friends!!

Happy Crews are always bringing their smile

till now...well on the coming years!!

Remember the first time travel with my buddies

Marc, Karen...

First time I travel to others country with my best friend-Bangkok-Hatyai

Seriously miss the moment so much

the first time i experience spending time

with my beloved friend travelling

Forgetting those stressful thingy

Remember those moment with my buddies

Shopping, Hanging Around, Yam Cha-ing, ShiSHA-ing, Party...etc

Remembered all those time no matter sad or happy time

We will always stick together

Who ever had their problem

We'll always gather up at somewhere

Never ever be alone to face the problem

There will always someone will be there with us

We'll always head to our PARADISE when we had no where to hang

We always love to give suprises to the one who have their big day

We are like a big family..

Brothers & Sisters Hoods

Thanks for the sweet moments u guys had gave me

I miss u guys so much..Do wait me back ya!

Remember the moment I getting into my job

Freelance jobs...

Roving team, Sampling job, Nike Event, Roadshows

Remember those moment there is a close friend always b with me

we always worked together

Eat together

hang out together

--MARC MARC MARC--

--MARCUS LOKE--

Without Jo No MArc

Without MArc No JO

That's what people always say

My first time experienced by working with philipmorris

SAMPOERNA GIRL!

SAmSOn ConCerts..Indonesia Fiesta..

SAMPOERNA ROCKZ

Somewhere, Someday, Somemoment

He appeared in my life

He cheer me up when I'm down

He always being supportive

He scolded me sometimes to show his cares to a dumb me

He sing to me from his heart

thru the lyrics, I hear him

He cooked & packed when I was in hurry for work

He never put a blame on being my driver

Drive me before & after work no matter where I'll be

He never put me aside

He never leave me alone

whenever he goes...he'll bring me along

Yet He had taught me alotz

I appreciate every moments you gave

THANK YOU

Nowmatter how we are now..you are always remember!!

God will guide us the way we heading!!

I celebrated my 21st birthday in State

I started my nightmare

well nothing will beat me down

I'll learn to stand on it

Keep my life going

I won care how she turn & twist story

I won care what she did behind me

A phrase always appear in my mind

"I LIVE FOR MYSELF, MY FUTURE

NOT FOR UNNESESSARY PERSON"

God will guide me the way...

WISH ALL OF YOU HAVE A MEMORABLE LAST MOMENT IN 2008

Missing u guys~

After it happened last week, I hav nvr been open my mouth except on phone. Well, finally I receive my Green Card. These come to the day I hav to decide what to do on next. I plan on taking cosmetology program & work during my free time. But I have to study & get my GED done before i start my program~ ARH...-I forgotten to bring my transcript to the State~! I gonna wait while tai ko to get another copy from the college again & mail it to me. Careless me!Hmph~ Have to wait for at least one month!

Guess what is first thing appear in my mind once I got my GC?-"woohoo, I can go back to M'sia ady~!" Yea..I so miss my buddies, family, my life in M'sia! I wanted to go back so badly. I'll work hard & get my flight ticket to go bec for 1 or 2 months & meet up again! I miss u guys so much!

Christmas coming soon. How will u guys celebrate over there? CLUB & PARTY again? missed all those life v used to have together~ partying~! I have nvr been to club at all since the day I step into the State! lol~ getting itch ady..OoHOoo..Well, maybe something different this year for me- snowy?coldy?winty day?lol~

Knowing that u guys going to Langkawi for a trip at the coming year Jan. OooOOoo..sob sob..I wish I'm there to join the trip thou!:'( Anyway, do enjoy there & snap more pictures! Missing of each of u~ luv always*

Melancholy~

Listening to a song

A song where I always like so much when I was in M'sia

A song where telling my feeling right now

-Say All I Need-

Yeah..I'm LOST..

I need air to breath...

Staying in the State for almost 2 months

Everyone will always think that

"wow..How great that you can go to State~!!"

Yea..how great?!~

I was thinking at the first I came here

If you guys ask- "JO~ how's State?"

"GREAT~! US is a great place!"

Honestly, I do fall into this place

But why..

Why I can't feel the happiness here?

Yeah~ someone had just leave us for 8 years

bump into my life

It should be a happy moment right?

But what I feel all the time is just

Disappointment, Stressful, Sadness

She's killing my soul

I have no place to release my feeling

I have no one to talk to as how I was in M'sia

I have no one to rely on, to believe to

I always hide in the room & cry alone

I can't cry it loud

well, I don dare to

Cause it'll create arguement

I keep all my feeling

All my sadness

No matter how much pains I had been through

From the day I reached to State till now

Have all store in my heart

I realise that I had change

I can't figure out what am I doin right now

I hardly control my temper

I'm getting mean

Just to protect myself

Avoiding hurts

I always tell myself

- "Jo, you have to be strong,

No matter what happen,

Stand still, don fall down!"

But I worry..

Worry one day, I break down~

Tears flow like river

Missing all my buddies so much

Flash back all those scenes

where we had been through in M'sia

sadness, happiness..

We shared together

We always there for each other

Whenever one of us having problems

I miss the big family

Our brothers-sisters-hood

You guys always remembered

*love*

Being with HER

Staying in the State for a month...

30 days passed

A lots of things had happened in this short month,

been sacrificed leave all the things in M'sia-

Family, Buddies, Lover, Education & my Lifestyle.

Finding hard to let thing goes & being alone

but have to..

I have a new life here..which i never ever wish to have to

Being here for a month,

I always stay in a moody day~

I feel like a prisoner,

Staying in a jail.

What ever i did..i need to pass through her..

i lost my privacy, my life..MYSELF~

i found out that is a big gap between me & her.

She too much control,

Too many words,

Hard to communicate as well.

She never ever bother about my feeling,

she just want me to be what she wanted to..

What she think is right..

By not letting me to be myself..

I tried to voice up my feeling for so many times..

even had arguement..

but what I got is just zerO.

She never accept whatever i said,

she never accept my personality,

She's not willing to be understand her own daugther

for never staying with her in 8 years

she never be respect of me-

for scolded me, yelled at me in sudden

& complaint about all the passed

blame on us..especially my dad

I feel so stress..so tire..for listening of her

telling the same old story in this 8 years

for comparing herself wif dad

I don find the point?

I just feel annoyed.

I feel so disappointed..

for everything she did to me.

I dunno how to face a people like her

yet she is my mom.

I dunno how to respect her..

even i tried so many time..

i just can't face or stand a person like her,

never ever admit the problems she have;

Never ever care about ppl's feeling at all;

Never ever listen to peoples';

Always aspecting everyone to follow her needs;

shout & yell whenever she feels wrong;

Always put the blame on others but not herself;

Turning all the stories to show out herself;

etc..

I had be silence all the while

after I found out pointless to talk to her, to discuss with her.

But yet, get scolded as well.

I'm tire..

I'm not a dog,

I'm not her maid,

I'm not her machine-ROBOT.

I have my own characters,

I have my own privacy,

I have my plans.

I know i gonna be tough

because I'm alone here.

I have nothing here.

I'll wait the time comes,

TO BE MYSELF

I miss Malaysia so much..I miss my life..

I miss the days that all of you for always being with me

Support me, care of me, loves me

all the while when I'm in M'sia.

I miss every single minutes that I had been in M'sia.

I miss my 21 years life there..

I love u all..

I wish I could get back my life..

Moving on..